Melissa NICHOLSON

MELISSA NICHOLSON: I can say from the other side of this—it’s a much harder, colder push than even the motherhood penalty. Job sharing is one of the few ways dual caregivers can make it work at all. You actually can keep your Senior level or Director level job and still do it well—WITH your partner to hand over your work baton every week.

Introduction

INTRO: Welcome to Job Share Revolution. The show about job sharing—a partnership between two people to bring two minds and skill sets to one full-time position. I’m Melissa Nicholson, former job sharer turned founder of the first U.S. job share company. But it wasn’t long ago that I felt like an utter failure at work and as a new parent. Job sharing was my game-changer. I reclaimed four days a week to fully engage in my life while my capable partner handled everything. Together, we achieved more than I ever could solo. Fast forward to many lessons learned to bring you the training and support I wish I’d had to change lives and the modern-day workplace. Let’s live life and slay work.

Melissa NICHOLSON INTRO

MELISSA NICHOLSON: Hey friend, it’s Mel. I am so glad you’re here, and I know that life is busy, so I thank you for spending your time with me on the Jobshare Revolution podcast, where every week we dive into workplace topics we hear are top of mind for you, from equity to wellness to flexibility, and of course, job sharing.

Welcome back to our special series on the seven biggest challenges driving the great working mom exodus of 2025. 450,000 mothers left the workforce in the first seven months of 2025 alone.

We’ve covered return-to-office mandates, cultural shifts, the childcare crisis, mental load and burnout, and the motherhood penalty. Today, we’re tackling something that hits very close to home for me: inadequate support for eldercare.

This is an episode that I know will resonate deeply with many of you, because if you’re not already in it, you will be. And honestly, I need to say this upfront—this one is really hard for me to talk about.

My kids were in middle school when my mother, Elaine, came into my care with an Alzheimer’s diagnosis, literally overnight, literally showed up at my back door having hallucinations with a UTI and moved right into our garage apartment. So that happened during the 2021 snowpocalypse ice storm in Austin. So nearly five years in now, I cannot believe I’m even saying that…

And I am still learning every single day what it means to be a sandwich generation dual caregiver.

So this hits hard. But the longer I’ve been in caregiving communities—because resources and support can be really hard to find—the more I’m realizing just how many women face this, and often younger even than I was at 46 years old.

So before we dive in, I want ya to know: If you’re caring for an aging parent or family member right now while trying to maintain your career, I see you. And I am you. This episode is for you.

The Sobering Statistics

Let me start with some statistics that really paint the picture of what we’re dealing with.

Upwards of 75% of family caregivers in the U.S. are women. And it’s daughters. Make no bones about this, it is daughters who are carrying the burden of care. Seventy-five percent. We find ourselves, like me, in a role we never asked for, we weren’t trained for, and we didn’t realize would come up so soon.

Women caring for their parents lose $300,000 on average in lifetime earnings. Three hundred thousand dollars. That’s retirement security gone. Outta there. Disappeared. That’s financial independence compromised.

The average caregiver is a 49-year-old woman who works outside the home caring for her single mother. Oh god, I can check every… Oh my God, when I saw this, I nearly passed out. I was like, “Check, check, check.” I could check nearly every single box of that. I could check nearly every single box on that one.

Family caregivers of a parent with dementia provide an estimated 21.9 hours of care per week. That’s essentially a part-time job on top of your full-time job. Check.

I can definitely tell you that that is about what I spend every single week. And things can just fly at you and come up, and you have to drop everything and go do them.

Just yesterday I took my mom to a podiatrist. [It] came up, there was an issue. She needed to get to a doctor, and I’m that person. That is what the life of a family caregiver can be like.

And Alzheimer’s caregivers? We provide on average one to four years more of care than caregivers of someone with another illness. We’re also more likely to be providing care for five years or longer. This is a long game. I’m nearing five years this February. Check.

I’m sharing this not to garner sympathy but because I know this is a reality that many, many women will face. And as Alzheimer’s numbers are projected to double in the U.S. in the next couple of decades, it’s something we need to talk about because it’s a hard-core reality so many people will face.

And from my perspective, what I’ve noticed is that people really don’t want to talk about it. They don’t ask how you’re doing. They don’t ask how my mom is doing. They don’t want to talk about it because it hits too close to home. They’re afraid it may happen to them. So, there’s that…

Why It’s Even Harder Than the Motherhood Penalty

And I want to talk about why it’s even harder than the Motherhood Penalty.

Without accessible and affordable eldercare prioritized and subsidized on a national level, I can say from the other side of this—it’s a much harder, colder push than even the motherhood penalty.

Your day can completely turn on a moment’s notice, as I just shared. A fall. A hospitalization. A sudden decline. And without employers who offer real support, starting with care support and solid, flexible work strategies, mid-to-senior women will and do leave, unable to do both.

There’s a Rosalynn Carter quote that I often think about: “There are only four kinds of people in the world: those who have been caregivers, those who are currently caregivers, those who will be caregivers, and those who will need caregivers.”

That really sits with me. Because it’s true. Care will touch all of us, every single one of us, in some way.

The Federal and Employer Landscape

Right now, federal support provides some assistance but falls dramatically short of addressing the crisis’s scale.

The National Council on Aging confirmed that funding for programs through the Administration for Community Living is extended through September 30, maintaining existing services. But that’s just maintaining—not expanding, not innovating.

The National Lifespan Respite Care Program provides new grants to states to offer temporary relief for caregivers. The VA extended its Program of Comprehensive Assistance for Family Caregivers through September 2028. But these programs help only a small subset of the total caregiver population.

As of fall 2025, no federal legislation has been passed to broadly fund or provide tax relief for all family caregivers. Bills like the bipartisan Credit for Caring Act remain in Congress—offering potential tax credits but not guaranteed financial relief.

Thanks for getting wonky with me, but we have to know what we’re dealing with here.

Now, employer responses vary widely. Some companies are progressive—offering dedicated caregiving leave beyond traditional parental leave, backup eldercare programs similar to childcare backup (that would be amazing), partnerships with platforms that provide care coordination services. Also very helpful.

Enhanced Employee Assistance Programs now include counseling specifically for caregiver burnout. Super helpful. And some companies have established caregiver Employee Resource Groups to build community and reduce stigma. Also helpful.

But here’s the truth: Many employers are failing to meet this moment. They’re rolling back remote work policies, forcing sandwich generation employees to choose between their demanding job and their family’s needs. They offer generic wellness initiatives without addressing the root cause of burnout. And managers often aren’t equipped to discuss caregiving challenges or manage teams with varying flexibility needs.

What Working Caregivers Are Doing

So what are employees in the sandwich generation doing to navigate their dual responsibilities?

Radical scheduling. They’re practicing extreme schedule optimization—front-loading work in the morning or completing it after parents and children are settled. This necessitates clear communication with managers about working hours that might look different.

Tech stack for caregivers. They’re using apps to track medical appointments, medication schedules, and coordinate with family members. Financial software helps manage the mounting costs of care.

I mean, I can tell you personally, technology has made all of this a lot easier. You can track your parents, which is wonderful. You’ve got Alexa. You’ve got cameras. You’ve got iphones that track where they are.

Proactive communication. Savvy employees are proactively communicating caregiving needs to their managers and HR. But that’s hard, you know? It’s hard to talk about these things.

We’ve been socialized to keep our family stuff private. It’s hard to kind of desocialize that. It’s hard to retrain yourself in being transparent and open about the fact that you have these caregiving responsibilities.

So, employees are presenting flexibility not as a need but as a solution to maintain their productivity. They’re highlighting how caregiving develops valuable skills like empathy and organization. What they can do, and I don’t know that people are really doing this, but a solution to maintain their current productivity and highlight how flexibility has developed valuable soft skills like empathy and organization.

Setting firm boundaries. Caregivers are learning to say “no.” No to non-essential tasks and set hard stops on their workday. So doing that really means that they can preserve their mental energy and prevent their own burnout, which is a huge problem in the care community.

Accessing federal and local resources. They’re digging in. They’re digging into state aging and disability services, VA benefits, and financial assistance programs to find any available support.

But honestly? It’s exhausting. It’s cobbling together solutions when what we need is systemic support.

Communities are incredible things. And people are seeking out communities. There’s definitely one that has helped me in so many ways called Parenting Aging Parents. And there are so many more because where employers might be failing and where our government is failing on many levels, the need is there. And there are non-profits and organizations and people who care about this that are filling in resources at least.

What Employers Can Do

So what can employers do to meet this moment? I know that a lot of employers are wondering about this. Here are three critical actions:

First, offer dedicated caregiving leave. Move beyond traditional parental leave by offering specific paid leave for eldercare. This is not just compassionate—it builds loyalty, it reduces turnover. It allows your employees to stay thriving in their positions. Some companies are seeing this really work, and the data shows it is paying off.

Second, provide comprehensive support programs. Offer backup eldercare services, partnerships with care coordination platforms, legal and financial guidance for caregivers.

I can tell you that key because you are going to get all of your documents in place—the POA, the medical POA. You know, all of that.

Enhanced EAPs that include counseling specifically for caregiver burnout. This is huge. I had a friend who passed away this year at fifty-one, who was caring for both of her parents with dementia. They were divorced, so she was essentially caring for two different sets of people. And, I was shocked to find out that she passed away. But honestly, the statistics are horrible: over 40% of caregivers to people with dementia pass away, die, before the person they are caring for. It’s startling and it’s scary.

Establish dedicated caregiver ERGs to build community and advocate for policy improvements. This is huge.

Third, embrace true flexibility—including job sharing. In fact, I really see job sharing as one of the very few flexible work practices that can allow family caregivers to stay in and thrive in their jobs while taking care of all of the medical appointments. All of the needs that their aging parents may have. All of the coordinat ion that they need to do on their end. It’s a way for them to work in this part-time capacity, hand over the baton, and still maintain a life for themselves, and be able to have the energy that they need for their jobs. A lot of people just don’t even see a way out, that they can even continue or do it.

So for sandwich generation employees, this eldercare caregiving portion, it hits many generations. It hits young adults who are in their twenties all the way on up to people who are in their seventies themselves. But for sandwich generation employees, flexibility is not a perk. It’s survival.

Job sharing offers the structured way to provide that flexibility while maintaining continuous coverage and very high performance.

How Job Sharing Helps Dual Caregivers

And this is where I get really passionate, because job sharing is one of the few ways dual caregivers can make it work at all.

You actually can keep your Senior level or Director level or C-Suite or manager job and still do it well—WITH your partner to hand over your work baton every week so that you can schedule those doctors appointments, you can take care of all the care things required of you.

Let me break down why job sharing is so powerful for caregivers:

For the employee—reduced hours, sustained career. Job sharing allows caregivers to reduce their weekly hours without derailing their career trajectory. You’re keeping professional connections. You’re maintaining your skills. You’re staying in the workforce during what might otherwise have forced you out entirely.

Shared cognitive load. With a partner, the mental load is halved. You have someone to catch tasks, provide continuity, offer support. That built-in backup is everything when you’re managing care responsibilities.

Improved work-life balance. You have dedicated time off to address caregiving needs, medical appointments, and personal rest. You’re not trying to squeeze everything into evenings and weekends while working full-time and slowly drowning. Or quickly drowning.

For the employer—retain top talent. By offering job sharing, companies can retain highly skilled, experienced professionals who would otherwise be forced to leave without any other option. These are often your mid-to-senior level women with decades of institutional knowledge, client relations, and so much know how.

Higher productivity and engagement. Two employees sharing a role are often more engaged and less prone to burnout than one overloaded employee. Fresh perspective and renewed energy come to the job.

Skill diversification and redundancy. Job-sharing partners bring complementary skills to the role. The company also benefits from built-in coverage for illness or vacation, providing seamless workflow continuity.

So let’s encourage men and support all caregivers, employers. One gender is not more suited to provide care than another—it’s just socialized, and it’s about damn time we unsocialize that because care in this country is on the backs of women, specifically mothers and daughters.

Personal Reflection

I think about my own journey. When my mom’s diagnosis came, I wasn’t job sharing anymore, but the skills I had learned from years of job sharing—the ability to delegate, to trust others, to give up control, to ask for help—those skills saved me.

If I had been job sharing when her diagnosis came, I know I could have kept my demanding career. I would have had a partner to cover when I would have needed to be at the doctor appointments or handle a crisis moment. I would have had built-in flexibility without having to constantly negotiate for it.

The sandwich generation is growing. More of us are caring for both children and aging parents. And the workplace needs to catch up. It needs to step up and wake the eff up.

There are more resources and organizations now…Hilarity for Charity, I love them. Parenting Aging Parents. And another one that I love is  Caring Across Generations a non-profit organization advocating at the national level. I will put links in the show notes to all three of these.

We’re starting to change the language from supporting working moms or working parents to supporting caregivers, to destigmatize care and recognize that the sandwich generation and those later will need support for dual caregiving.

But we need systemic change. And until that happens, job sharing offers a practical path to keep working while caring.

Closing

So let me wrap this up. Inadequate support for eldercare is forcing impossible choices for families. Mid-to-senior women are leaving the workforce because they simply cannot do both without support.

For employers: Offer dedicated caregiving leave. Provide comprehensive support programs. Embrace true flexibility, including job sharing. These aren’t nice-to-haves—they’re essential for retaining experienced talent.

For caregivers: You’re not alone. Seek out resources and community. Communicate proactively with your employer. And seriously explore job sharing as a way to maintain your career during this intense season, that hopefully, is a short season.

Next episode is our series finale—career transitions and relaunching after a break. We’re going to talk about how job sharing is a secret weapon against ageism and can propel women’s careers at a time they typically must step back.

If this episode resonated with you, if you are right smack dab panini’d in the sandwich generation or you know someone who is, please share this episode . Remind them of that Rosalynn Carter quote: We will all be touched by caregiving in some way.

Remember, we are in this together, friend. I’m sending you so much love. I’ll see you Tuesday after next for our series finale. Hug those people during this holiday season. They are ours and we love them. We care for them, and hopefully, they’ll care for us.   Take care of you. It’s all in you.